This is still me ❤️

Why haven't I learned my lesson? Last Friday morning, whilst scrolling through my phone, I was thinking about what a crappy year a lot of people were having. 2022 seemed to have brought some terrible luck for some. I then began to reflect on my 2022 and realised that a lot of pretty shit stuff happened in my life too. Why wasn't I feeling miserable? I thought more about this. There have been some extremely low times this year, but my ability to bounce back from these has reached a strength I never thought possible for me. I am not trying to make out that I am some serene, zen, being; I still have my moments, but even how I view those are different. When bad times come, I still get upset, I show my emotions, I shout, I scream, I cry for as long as I need to, but somehow, deep down, I am safe in the knowledge that things will get better and knowing that is like my lifeboat, something for me to swim towards when I am drowning in those choppy waters. On Saturday, the husband

Gratitude is the attitude Yesterday, I posted about the emotional rollercoaster I’ve been on this week Despite the downs, I have managed to find plenty to be grateful for and here are my top 3. Sunday Cinema Date On Sunday, the husband and I took ourselves to the local cinema to watch Top Gun Maverick. I love going to the cinema, the husband, not so much. The weather was pleasant, so we decided to walk the 2 miles to the cinema. I don’t like to spoil things for others, so I won’t say too much about the film itself, other than that I loved it! Usually, the husband and I will go for dinner or drinks so it was a refreshing change to go to the cinema on a Sunday afternoon. Medium stats For those of you reading this that are Medium members, you will understand where I am coming from. Since joining at the end of April, I have checked my stats almost daily, along with my medium partnership program earnings, which in the first two months have not exceeded 38 cents. So I was pleased

Up, down and loop the loop. Last Friday, after keeping a few things to myself and letting them bubble under the surface, I got them off my chest. As usual, I felt so much better and wondered why I didn’t just let it all out in the first place. The problem I have is that I am much better with my words when they are written, I have time to go over them, think about what I have said and reword where necessary, this is why I don’t send voice notes, although I do like to receive them. I had been anxious about going out that evening, alcohol and anxiety do not mix. Thankfully, the air was now clear, and I could go out and enjoy my evening. The husband and I went out with some friends and danced the night away in a local Irish bar. On Saturday, I felt like a new woman, albeit a groggier new woman. I didn’t feel the need to eat all the food like I had the past few days and the husband and I enjoyed a chilled day indoors. I was woken up by Toby on Sunday morning, who decided he wanted to c

You can’t live a positive life with a negative mind. Today, I wasn’t feeling my best. Despite having good boundaries in place, the negative thoughts can still creep in. When this happens I have a list of go-to self-care activities and I thought I would share these with you. Meditation I always thought meditation was sitting crossed-legged on the floor and clearing your mind completely, which, quite frankly, feels impossible for me. I gave up trying to meditate for ages until it was explained to me that is not the case. The actual definition of meditation, according to Merriam-Webster, is: 1: to engage in contemplation or reflection. 2: to engage in mental exercise (such as concentration on one’s breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness Each morning, I make myself a cup of tea, set a timer for 10 minutes and sit in silence, letting my brain do what it wants to, which is usually worry, roll off my list of things

It is not your job to make others happy. I had never heard of the term “setting boundaries” until I started therapy, I certainly didn’t know what it meant. Yet I have found it a key part of my healing process. Why hadn’t I heard about this sooner? I will admit, that I can sometimes find setting boundaries difficult. I am a people pleaser, I want to keep everyone happy, unfortunately, this can cost me my happiness. Your peace should be your priority. This isn’t always going to sit well with others, but if someone is ok with you putting their happiness first at the expense of your own, maybe it’s time to question that relationship. We also need to be respectful of the boundaries others put in place. We all want different things and we all have different priorities in life, so whilst we may not understand the thoughts and feelings of others, we should still be respectful of them. Since I started setting boundaries in my life, I have experienced a dramatic improvement in my overall

There’s no stopping me I am so thankful that I don't have a 9–5 job at the moment. I can’t say I’m not working, as writing has taken over my life and I love it. I am constantly brainstorming new content ideas and I spend most of my days, writing, planning what to write and researching. It’s my dream career. I was quite sad to have a busy weekend to take me away from it. We had a family bbq at my brothers on Thursday, my parents, my other brother and his family were staying at the same hotel as us, so we had a few drinks in the pub next door when we got back. One of the members of staff was so rude! Berating us because we hadn’t booked a table, despite only two tables being occupied. We weren’t expecting to be going and were just going in on the off chance if there hadn’t been tables available, we would have gone elsewhere. He continued to be rude and snippy to us throughout the evening and in the end, my dad told him about himself. He was fine after that. Incidentally, the

It’s been such a positive week for me, although mindset is everything. Some things happened this week that could have dampened my spirits, but because I was in a good frame of mind, I have managed to focus on the positives and put a positive spin on some of the possible negatives. I know that I may not feel like this every week will be like this, but I plan on enjoying it for as long as it lasts. What went well for you this week? ❤️

This week, I wanted to focus on relationships. I am always very aware of how lucky I am to have the family and friends I do. We learn so much from the people we spend time with and I am truly grateful for those that I am blessed to have in my life ❤️

It’s been a mixed bag this week, but I have managed to turn it around. I enjoyed getting dressed up and going out for dinner and drinks with the girls last Friday. In the week, after having a really busy few weeks, I easily fell back into my usual routine, which helped turn my mood around. I finally wrote my article for publication! It only took me a month. I rewrote and re-read it about 7 times but I think I am happy with it now. What went well for you this week? ♥️

Another week, another mood…or two I feel like my moods are a bit of Russian roulette at the moment. When will the gun go off? Last Friday, after an anxious week of worrying about the fact my contract had been pushed back a week, I decided to walk to my counselling session. I am well versed by now in self-care, but I am not well versed in the art of patience. I know doing some gentle exercise will help my mindset, but during my walk, I didn’t feel ecstatically after 5 minutes, so I spent the first part of the walk feeling pretty miserable, wishing I had just driven instead. During my walk, the first glimmer of light came about 15 minutes in when I saw this little patch of wildflowers growing by the side of the road. I hadn’t noticed it whilst driving and just seeing that, made me feel a little bit happier. Just as I was about 5 minutes from my session, the joy of flowers now forgotten, I got a text from my friend, I had referred her for a role on the same contract as me and she had

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Despite being an anxious mess this week, due to certain things not going to plan, making time at the end of the week to think of the things that went well was really easy and helps me to realise what truly matters. I spent a relaxing weekend with my friend in Hereford, we lunched, we walked (me in inappropriate footwear resulting in blisters) and we lounged around, its nice to feel at home without having to do any chores. I spent some much needed time with the husband, unfortunately for him, its been a stressful week for me so I am conscious that he didnt have the best of me, but as always, he showed me love, kindness and endless patience and I am very aware of how lucky I am to have him. On Wednesday, I went to Essex to see my brother on his 40th birthday and spent a few hours with my family which was really lovely. I realise now, that all those things I have been stressing about are not as significant as I first thought. What went well for you this week? ❤

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I had such a lovely weekend in the New Forest with the husband. It feels like we haven’t had a weekend away for ages, it was relaxed and we just went with the flow each day. Although we are both at home, he has been busy with work and I am often shut away in the sanctuary so I was really grateful to have some quality time with him. I’m ending this week with a huge sigh of relief after handing my notice in. I’ve been so unhappy in that job and it has caused me that much stress and anxiety, that I have been off sick for most of this year. This has been a blessing in disguise, as it has given me time and space I needed to get myself better and learn how to look after myself properly. I’m very fortunate that I was able to do this. I started to feel the anxiety come back this week, when I realised it was time to go back to work and hand in my notice. The close the day got, the more panic I felt, so rather than wait until I had a meltdown, I went online to see what my options were, I discuss

Earlier this year, a friend of mine, who left my employers last year, was telling me about her job, I told her if any new roles came up to let me know. A couple of weeks ago, a role came up, so I sent her my CV, which she then sent over just after Easter. Two days later the agency called me and set up an interview for the following week. The day before my interview, they called and offered me the position, I hadn't even had an interview, although this still went ahead as a formality. Knowing I already had the role, I was a lot less nervous and the interview actually went better because of that. It was a great way to start the long weekend. The husband was taking me away for me belated birthday treat, so we went off to the New Forest, somewhere I've always wanted to go and I was extra happy, knowing I had the new job offer. We had a really lovely weekend, visiting various villages, pubs, restaurants, a beach and a castle. I was feeling on top of the world. We came home on M

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Wow. What a week it has been. I enjoyed a fabulous relaxing weekend away and this week I have caught up with some friends at lunch, even managing to control my alcohol intake, without even trying. I am happily riding a high vibe at the moment and I am enjoying every single minute. I love it when life is like this, I am happy, things are going smoothly and I just need to embrace each and every moment. Every time this happens, there is the little voice in the back of my mind saying "Clare, you know that this isn't going to last" That voice used to be a lot louder, so loud in fact, that it used to stop me from enjoying the happy moments. Now, I am getting a lot better at embracing the highs and riding the lows. Every week, I feel like I am overcoming another obstacle in life, sometimes they are big, sometimes they are small, but either way, the feeling of overwhelm is getting easier to deal with. Its still overwhelming, but my stress levels are not as through the roof

As I mentioned in this weeks blog post I spent a lovely Easter weekend with the husband. We visited my brother in his new house and then we spent the day and night in beautiful Canterbury. I was rather relieved to have a quiet week ahead. Yesterday, I received a message on Medium, inviting me to be added as a writer on one of their publications. It’s a personal development publication, which I already follow, as I do really enjoy the articles on there. I was so excited, I did wonder if maybe they had sent it to the wrong person! Writing for a publication means that my writing will reach a wider audience, this particular publication has over 2000 followers. Once I am back home from my relaxing weekend, I will be devouring all the information provided and making a submission. Wish me luck 🍀

Cards on the table. I set an intention at the beginning of the week to track my food and. I wish I hadn’t. It’s. So. Fucking. Boring. You know what happens when I track food? I eat more, because I am always thinking about food. I wanted to track my food to keep an eye on the nutrients I was getting, but as soon as I opened my fitness pal, it became a calorie counting exercise and I just cannot be arsed with that. I get too obsessed! I once looked up the calories for a lemsip! I was ill, but still didn’t want to go over my calorie threshold. It’s a miserable existence and I’m just not needing this in my life right now. Yes I could do with losing quite a few pounds, but it’s really not a priority for me right now. Life is too short, there are enough things to think about, to worry about and food isn’t going to be one of them. So I am happily erasing that one from the list this week. After I stopped obsessing over food, I started obsessing over my skin. I’m not sure if it’s my age,