This is still me ❤️

My week in a rather large nutshell Friday brings PMS. Joy. A recent symptom it has decided to bestow upon me is sore, swollen gums as well as all the usual delightful things. I also had a dream that I went back to my old job it was more of a nightmare, I woke up in a cold sweat. I was a bit rattled by the uncharacteristic negativity I was feeling, but I was determined to push through. I got up, made myself a cup of tea, did some meditation, did my morning reflection, read my daily stoic & set my intentions for the day, but I wasn't feeling my usual sense of satisfaction. It was annoying me. The ring doorbell jangled to let me know someone was approaching our front door, the annoyance that hadn't yet subsided, racing back to the surface, when I realised who it was. Charity Bag Man. After lockdown, when clearly I didn't have enough to moan about, I decided to order a no junk mail sticker for my letterbox. Junk mail never bothered me before, but I developed a passion

It had a surprising outcome We're halfway through the week! These days, I'm not sure if it's something to celebrate, as time seems to be moving far too fast. At the weekend, I hit a bit of a wall. I felt like I had very little positivity left in my tank and it really irked me. I spent far too much time thinking of ways to replenish the sunny disposition I have come to enjoy. The more I floundered, the more upset and frustrated I was getting until I stopped and asked myself, why I was clambering so desperately to feel happy? Apart from the obvious fact that feeling low is rubbish and that I have a fear that anytime I start to feel crap my depression is coming back, I realised that without these miserable, low moments, I would not feel the giddy heights of happiness that I feel and I certainly wouldn't appreciate them as much as I do now. So, I decided that rather than spend all my energy fighting with my feelings, I would embrace my Britishness and keep calm and ca

What went weSometimes the little things in life are the most important. It's been another tumultuous week, I don't know how I am feeling half the time and it's so confusing. Once again, stopping and reflecting on my week helps me to see the good things in my life. Spending time with my parents. Sometimes, when things aren't going as you expect them to, spending time with your parents can take the pain out of things. Knowing they will always be there and have my back can sometimes be all the comfort I need. Relaxing Massage I meditated before going to my massage, getting all of my woes and worries out of my head, leaving me to just enjoy an hour of escape. As much as we need to think things through, we also need times when we can just forget our troubles and relax. Taking small steps toward my goals The one thing I do have is my writing and I have been relentless this week in taking small steps each day to make some progress. I have taken myself completely out of my

that completely changed my mindset I had an entire list of ideas on what to write for the Wednesday Wisdom post, but fate had other things in store. 6 weeks ago, I resigned from a full-time job, after being offered a 6-month contracting position. I wrote about this in a post I had published in the Orange Journal, which you can read here I resigned just in the nick of time to make the start date for the new job. Since then, my start date was then moved 3 times, the first two times causing me to panic and burst into tears. I was contacted two weeks ago and told the date would be moving yet again and they would confirm by the end of the following week. After chasing twice, I received a call yesterday to tell me that the position is no longer available and I was sent two other job specs, which are for less money. I was pretty stunned. I didn’t know how to feel, as much as I want to pursue a career in writing, I planned to do that alongside a paid job until I can make enough money

Gratitude is the attitude Yesterday, I posted about the emotional rollercoaster I’ve been on this week Despite the downs, I have managed to find plenty to be grateful for and here are my top 3. Sunday Cinema Date On Sunday, the husband and I took ourselves to the local cinema to watch Top Gun Maverick. I love going to the cinema, the husband, not so much. The weather was pleasant, so we decided to walk the 2 miles to the cinema. I don’t like to spoil things for others, so I won’t say too much about the film itself, other than that I loved it! Usually, the husband and I will go for dinner or drinks so it was a refreshing change to go to the cinema on a Sunday afternoon. Medium stats For those of you reading this that are Medium members, you will understand where I am coming from. Since joining at the end of April, I have checked my stats almost daily, along with my medium partnership program earnings, which in the first two months have not exceeded 38 cents. So I was pleased

Another week, another mood…or two I feel like my moods are a bit of Russian roulette at the moment. When will the gun go off? Last Friday, after an anxious week of worrying about the fact my contract had been pushed back a week, I decided to walk to my counselling session. I am well versed by now in self-care, but I am not well versed in the art of patience. I know doing some gentle exercise will help my mindset, but during my walk, I didn’t feel ecstatically after 5 minutes, so I spent the first part of the walk feeling pretty miserable, wishing I had just driven instead. During my walk, the first glimmer of light came about 15 minutes in when I saw this little patch of wildflowers growing by the side of the road. I hadn’t noticed it whilst driving and just seeing that, made me feel a little bit happier. Just as I was about 5 minutes from my session, the joy of flowers now forgotten, I got a text from my friend, I had referred her for a role on the same contract as me and she had