Skip to main content

Welcome 2017



So its halfway into January, the regime isn't going too badly, although I did have Burger & Chips washed down with several glasses of wine last night ( I was celebrating viewing a potential wedding venue) and now have a doughnut in front of me. Apart from that its going well. I've decided to try The Body coach lean in 15 plan, it's actually quite easy and the meals I've made so far are really nice, although I currently have things in my kitchen cupboards that I'd never even seen before, such as Fennel. WTF is that all about? It was actually quite nice.

In all seriousness, I need to lose weight. After I separated from ex 8 years ago I was so slim, a size 10-12 could literally wear anything I wanted, but it's slowly piled on and I am now 3 stone heavier, hardly any of my clothes look decent on me and I feel awful. I have two weddings this year, one of which I am bridesmaid for and I am the biggest bridesmaid by far.

So now is a good a time as any for a change of lifestyle as I finally feel like my head is in the right place, which I never thought would happen as a couple of years ago I was told I had Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD) I used to worry about EVERYTHING, to the point it was interfering with my life. My head was a mess.

I had been with my boyfriend for about 18 months, we'd been living together for 6 and I gradually started letting the worry creep in, if he went out for the night even to play football for a couple of hours, I would be panicking about his safety and could not rest until he was home, this sometimes meant staying up until the early hours. If he was later than I expected (even though he never told me what time he would be home) I would be so distressed I would either be in tears or furious, which would then end in an argument.

I would worry about missing the train to work, getting a seat on the train, someone turning up at my house unexpectedly, my boyfriends  kids breaking something, the list was endless, not to mention exhausting and my health and my relationship were starting to suffer big time. I was living on my nerves, so when I had a drink, which was quite often, I would turn into this awful person shouting and screaming at my boyfriend, most of which I wouldn't even remember the next day, I would just wake up with a feeling of dread.

It all came to a head after one particularly bad drunken rage and I knew that if I wanted to save my relationship I needed to do something about it, rather than be an ostrich and bury my head in the sand. Then my friend told me she was seeing a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist and they had diagnosed her with OCD. The symptoms she described were almost identical to how I felt. I went online to research therapists in my area and booked myself an appointment for the following week at lunchtime. I work in London so the fees were pretty expensive but my relationship was far too important not to mention my health! I was just praying it would help.

 


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Is Success The Thing That Scares Us? Or Is It Failure We Really Fear?

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. - Winston Churchill If you fear failure, the above quote from Winston Churchill can be seen as comforting, failing at something can be a huge blow to our egos. But what if you aren't scared to fail? What if succeeding is the thing that scares you most? Failure is something that some of us are quite prepared for. Before we've even set out to do something, that voice in your head is already saying "it probably won't work out". We often prepare ourselves for the worst outcome to protect our fragile egos. If we fail, things will stay as they are and whether we are happy with our current situation or not, it is a lot easier to stay in a familiar situation. Of course, we don't want to fail, we'll feel rubbish about it, sometimes it means we can't do the things we had hoped for at the time, but ultimately, nothing has changed, and we can usually fall back into our old routin...
Post a Comment
Read more

5 Articles On Medium To Help You Accomplish Your Goals

This is my 700th post on Medium 🥳 I think I’ve come a long way since my first post Welcome To My Blog In yesterdays post, I shared 5 Steps To Setting Goals & Some Useful Tools & Tips Here are 5 articles I found on Medium that also provide some useful information around goal setting In the post What Do You Want? from Gustavo Gallina, we are reminded; “Dreams should be pursued. Set objectives and strive toward them.” In 3 Ways To Make Habits Stick Sobaan Saeed, also talks about failure “You’re gonna fail, you’re gonna screw up but if you show up with that positive attitude every day and just keep trying to do better that’s really all you can ask of yourself.” Daria Haller talks about self discipline in 8 Brilliant Ways To Master Your Self Discipline “don’t forget to reward yourself for your accomplishments.” Eve Arnold makes some great points in the article Why Trading Your Life Hack Mindset For Mindful Productivity Means You Wake Up Happier “Mindful prod...
Post a Comment
Read more

5 Articles on Medium That Helped Me Overcome Self Doubt

If you read yesterday's article , you’ll know that I’m back from holiday and rather than being full of self-assurance, I'm battling with self-doubt. Yesterday morning, I begrudgingly got out of bed, looked through my to-do list and very quickly decided it was going to be another slow day, reminding myself that it was perfectly ok, although I wasn’t entirely convinced. I decide to read some articles on medium, which I find to be much better for my mind than scrolling through Tik Tok (which I did for the first time this week for longer than I care to admit!) I’m so thankful I did. I came across Alex Mather’s article If you work for yourself and have self-doubt read this “emotions of doubt, are based not on reality, but on our thoughts.” Yes! Everything swimming through my head was all about a failure that hadn’t yet happened, after all, how can you fail at getting work as a writer when you haven’t even submitted any work or made any applications?? Calley Overtons artic...
Post a Comment
Read more