Don't kill my vibe

Tuesday 1st March I was in such a good mood yesterday morning, despite being awoken by the husband snoring practically in my ear. I got up and decided to make the most of the extra hours in the day and put a film on downstairs, my attention was soon distracted and I ended up writing a blog post instead. At 7am, I decided to jump in the shower after which I braved the scales, sadly the fact that I haven't eaten in less than 12 hours has not lost me 2 stone, rude. I have found that weighing & measuring myself regularly (once a week or so) helps me keep my weight more under control, if I don't, my brain decides I am skinny and I can eat what I want, which hasn't been the case since 2010. Even the scales cannot ruin my positive mood! I make myself a smoothie, keen to get more fruit and veg on board after the boozy birthday celebrations for the husband at the end of last week and I take myself off to the sanctuary to read my first chapter or Miracle Morning, which is just the introduction today. I would have read more but I had to go to Zoe's for my lashes. My mood was just getting better, I felt like I was radiating joy, I love feeling like this and it makes a welcome change. On the drive, I was thinking to myself how much this way of life suited me, in my ideal world I would be a freelance writer, where I could write in my own time and wouldn't be beholden to the 9-5, which is something I always cherished the security of. I thought to myself, why can't I do this? If this is what makes me happy, then I should really look into this and I resolved to do just that. Then my little friend Veronica appeared, whispering "but what about the money, the house, all those nice things you can do and have?" I thought about this. Yes, its lovely to have nice things, but do they really make me happy? When I was younger, earning a really crappy wage, I used to covet designer bags, expensive shoes and make up. Now I am in a better position to have those thing, guess what? I don't really want them and when I have had them, they haven't made me feel the way I thought they would. I'm still me, having stuff doesn't make me any different, apart from a bit poorer than I was. For example, we want to move house, it is really for more space, the boys are older now and it can be a bit cramped when they're here, the husband is using the dining table to work from home and that set up is a permanent fixture in the living room now, taking up rather a lot of space. Will the new house make me any happier though? I have been literally placing my happiness on hold for so long because "When we move, I will be happier because....." What if we weren't in a position to move? Plenty of other families live in the same house with more people, its not the end of the world. I realise I have placed so much of my happiness in the future, that I have been forgetting to be happy in the here and now and making the most of what I have and I have plenty to be happy about. I share my thoughts with Zoe and before you know it, my lashes are done and I am on my way back home to get ready for my Indian head massage with Julie. I cannot wait. It is 45 minutes of pure relaxation, I didn't want it to end! I walk home in a blissful daze. I go home, the husband is making himself some breakfast, even though its almost lunchtime, he's in a grumpy mood as, get this, he hasn't slept well. He seemed to be sleeping pretty well this morning, snoring his head off at 5am! It seems that our vibes are not aligned and in an effort not to kill my own high vibe, I retreat to the sanctuary to do some writing. I think I'll be spending rather a lot of time up here :)