This is still me ❤️

True Crime articles will now be posted on Thursdays I can't tell you how good it is to be back reading articles on Medium. I honestly noticed a massive dip in my motivation without them. I've read so many inspiring articles recently, that I currently have 50 saved on my list, but today I am going to share the 5 that pulled me out of my funk this week. I'll start with You Are Not Alone by Kristin Austin. For some time now, I've been trying to think of a way to capture how I am feeling. I've tried mood tracker apps but I find them to be quite limited, so when I read Kristin's article, I was intrigued by the image at the top of the article. Graphics show what she was thinking and what she was feeling, as well as her mindset while writing. Where do I get myself this? That is when I discovered 750 words . I'll let you read the article for the full details. "Suddenly, although I was travelling my scary treacherous life path, I was no longer alone. Big

I always believed that I was the type of person, that if something wasn't going how I wanted it, I gave up. If the weight didn't come off after eating well for a few days, I would get bored, eat cake and say screw the diet. If I slept in when I was supposed to get up and exercise, I would decide to stay in bed and then barely move all day, thinking what is the point. Even sometimes in the past with writing, I would miss it for a day and then think "Oh I've blown it now" Whilst consistency is extremely important, it doesn't mean that we have to live our lives by ridiculously strict rules, in order to achieve our goals. For example, going back to dieting. If I put myself on a strict 1200-calorie-a-day diet for a month, I would lose weight, but I would be miserable and this is where I have gone wrong in the past. It's the same with exercising, I put myself under so much pressure with it, that any enjoyment I do get out of it is ruined because it is now

Why haven't I learned my lesson? Last Friday morning, whilst scrolling through my phone, I was thinking about what a crappy year a lot of people were having. 2022 seemed to have brought some terrible luck for some. I then began to reflect on my 2022 and realised that a lot of pretty shit stuff happened in my life too. Why wasn't I feeling miserable? I thought more about this. There have been some extremely low times this year, but my ability to bounce back from these has reached a strength I never thought possible for me. I am not trying to make out that I am some serene, zen, being; I still have my moments, but even how I view those are different. When bad times come, I still get upset, I show my emotions, I shout, I scream, I cry for as long as I need to, but somehow, deep down, I am safe in the knowledge that things will get better and knowing that is like my lifeboat, something for me to swim towards when I am drowning in those choppy waters. On Saturday, the husband

Over the last few weeks, I've been spending about 90% of my waking moments working towards my goal of writing for a living. I wake up and am straight online posting on platforms that I am unable to schedule posts on (or haven't learned how to yet) I could wait until later in the day, but I find that a lot of people read posts first thing, myself included. I meditate, do my self-reflection and review my to-do list for the day, apart from writing, I read other people's articles and engage with other writers on the platforms as practically all the articles and books I've read say this is a huge factor in being a successful writer, it's something I've found surprisingly fun. On top of this, I'm trying (and failing) to keep a clean and tidy home, cook dinners, see friends and family, and generally have a life. I'm not complaining, I bloody love it. I finally feel like I have a purpose. However, me being me, I have given myself a rather large to-do list, t

Small steps, daily. Set up a LinkedIn profile This week, I am going to set up a LinkedIn profile for my writing. I'm feeling quite nervous about this as although I have been writing this blog for 5 years now, I don't have any "work experience" when it comes to writing. It feels a bit like a catch-22 situation as I may not get writing work with no experience, but how can I get experience if no one will hire me? Well, no one is going to know anything about me if I don't put anything out there so this will be a good step in the right direction. Incorporate some movement into my days. I need to find something I enjoy to get me moving more. I'm feeling overweight and unfit and the exercises I have done in the past seem like such a chore, so this week I am getting up, getting my happy playlist on and I am going to have a little dance for a few songs. I think I'll enjoy starting the day like that. Finish the online SEO course I started this course a co

My week in a rather large nutshell Friday brings PMS. Joy. A recent symptom it has decided to bestow upon me is sore, swollen gums as well as all the usual delightful things. I also had a dream that I went back to my old job it was more of a nightmare, I woke up in a cold sweat. I was a bit rattled by the uncharacteristic negativity I was feeling, but I was determined to push through. I got up, made myself a cup of tea, did some meditation, did my morning reflection, read my daily stoic & set my intentions for the day, but I wasn't feeling my usual sense of satisfaction. It was annoying me. The ring doorbell jangled to let me know someone was approaching our front door, the annoyance that hadn't yet subsided, racing back to the surface, when I realised who it was. Charity Bag Man. After lockdown, when clearly I didn't have enough to moan about, I decided to order a no junk mail sticker for my letterbox. Junk mail never bothered me before, but I developed a passion

It had a surprising outcome We're halfway through the week! These days, I'm not sure if it's something to celebrate, as time seems to be moving far too fast. At the weekend, I hit a bit of a wall. I felt like I had very little positivity left in my tank and it really irked me. I spent far too much time thinking of ways to replenish the sunny disposition I have come to enjoy. The more I floundered, the more upset and frustrated I was getting until I stopped and asked myself, why I was clambering so desperately to feel happy? Apart from the obvious fact that feeling low is rubbish and that I have a fear that anytime I start to feel crap my depression is coming back, I realised that without these miserable, low moments, I would not feel the giddy heights of happiness that I feel and I certainly wouldn't appreciate them as much as I do now. So, I decided that rather than spend all my energy fighting with my feelings, I would embrace my Britishness and keep calm and ca

An extract from this week’s Substack newsletter I like to start each month by looking back on the previous month to see what went well and what didn't, how I can improve, what habits worked for me and any little ways I can make my life a bit easier for myself On the surface, June was a good month, but when I look a bit deeper, I can see that it wasn't without its challenges. I'll start with the challenges and where I can improve, that way we can finish on a positive note, rather than finish thinking how rubbish I have been! Emotional Hangovers Despite knowing I suffer from these, it still doesn't stop me. At the end of this week, I suffered terribly after drinking Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday this week. It's not a regular occurrence, but it is something I need to be more aware of and consciously make an effort to have more alcohol-free days. Not putting my screens away Guilty!! I managed to do this for a few days here and there, but I am still picking up

Feeling Thankful I’m so thankful to have had a positive week. Although I do wonder how much of it was simply down to my mindset. Reviewing my outgoings. As I mentioned in yesterday's post, I had been sort of putting this off. I was scared that I would look at the numbers and realise I needed to earn money immediately and would have to take the next job that came along. Thankfully, I have enough money to pay the bills for a few months. This does of course mean that I have to cut back on a lot of things but when I weigh it up, the choice between being at home doing my writing vs earning lots of money, there is no contest. Money really can’t buy happiness. Good results on medium I’ve had my best month on Medium since joining back in April. I’ve had lots of views, claps, comments, and followers and I have earned the most! Sadly not enough to pay the bills, in fact barely a cup of tea but it’s a huge win for me and I have learned so much from all the other brilliant writers. Mee

Finally, a week where I can stop and breathe. It's been a positive week and I feel with each new day, brings new things to learn. I sometimes feel like I have only just begun living my life as I am meant to, which is odd at the age of 41. Last week I started adding a "song of the day" to my social media pages, the intention behind these is to get everyone's day off on a positive note. I thought I would share these on my Friday posts for everyone to enjoy, by adding the link to the day of the week. On Friday I went out with a couple of friends for some Friday night drinks. We sat in a beer garden, drinking rose and chit-chatting about our lives. I had a picture taken, which I usually hate but for once I didn't. When I wondered why I noticed that I looked relaxed and not like I had the weight of the world on my shoulders, it felt good to realise that. There was a man at the pub that I was convinced was the actor who played Martin Fowler in Eastenders. I was t

As always, I hope that someone may take comfort in these posts and realise that they are not alone. I originally started writing blog posts on WordPress back in 2017. I have finally imported everything over to Medium, which took a while! I am now in the process of reviewing the older posts and rewriting them, my writing has improved rather a lot since then! I’m still keeping all the original versions on WordPress for nostalgic reasons but I wanted to reshare some of those posts, This week, I want to share some posts about mental health and the start of my journey with anxiety. How I was diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder. How My Anxious Mind Affects My Self Esteem Want To Increase The Worrying In Your Mind? Get Divorced What Happens When Getting The Wrong Help Causes You More Worry

An extract from this weeks Substack newsletter Quality over quantity When it comes to friendships, it’s not about having lots of people around us but having the right people around us. Always be respectful of other people’s boundaries We should all have boundaries in place, it’s an important part of self-care. Avoid toxic people Some people are drains and some people are radiators, we should go for the ones who provide the most warmth, rather than those who leave us feeling diminished. Not all relationships will last forever And that’s ok. It’s ok to disconnect from anyone who you do not enjoy spending time with. We are all human We all make mistakes at times, and we can hold our hands up to those things and learn from them. Subscribe to my free substack newsletter.❤️

What went weSometimes the little things in life are the most important. It's been another tumultuous week, I don't know how I am feeling half the time and it's so confusing. Once again, stopping and reflecting on my week helps me to see the good things in my life. Spending time with my parents. Sometimes, when things aren't going as you expect them to, spending time with your parents can take the pain out of things. Knowing they will always be there and have my back can sometimes be all the comfort I need. Relaxing Massage I meditated before going to my massage, getting all of my woes and worries out of my head, leaving me to just enjoy an hour of escape. As much as we need to think things through, we also need times when we can just forget our troubles and relax. Taking small steps toward my goals The one thing I do have is my writing and I have been relentless this week in taking small steps each day to make some progress. I have taken myself completely out of my

Mind, body & soul I’ve been so focused on my writing lately, that I have neglected some other areas of my life, so I’ve decided that I would try and do 1 thing each for my mind, body and soul. Put my phone away In last week's blog post I mentioned an advert I saw at the cinema about putting our phones away and enjoying what we are watching. I am incredibly guilty of this, even as I sit and type this now, I have a program on in the background that I have recorded. This week, I am going to put my phone on Do Not Disturb each day and put my phone, IPad & laptop in the kitchen whilst I watch a program. Sounds easy, but even in the cinema, I had to resist the urge to get my phone out of my bag. It's a very bad habit and I want to undo it. Get my steps up Although I am thoroughly enjoying the amount of time I have available to spend writing, the downside is that I am spending less time walking around. This week, I aim to try and increase my daily steps by 1000. I w

Gratitude is the attitude Yesterday, I posted about the emotional rollercoaster I’ve been on this week Despite the downs, I have managed to find plenty to be grateful for and here are my top 3. Sunday Cinema Date On Sunday, the husband and I took ourselves to the local cinema to watch Top Gun Maverick. I love going to the cinema, the husband, not so much. The weather was pleasant, so we decided to walk the 2 miles to the cinema. I don’t like to spoil things for others, so I won’t say too much about the film itself, other than that I loved it! Usually, the husband and I will go for dinner or drinks so it was a refreshing change to go to the cinema on a Sunday afternoon. Medium stats For those of you reading this that are Medium members, you will understand where I am coming from. Since joining at the end of April, I have checked my stats almost daily, along with my medium partnership program earnings, which in the first two months have not exceeded 38 cents. So I was pleased

My productivity has skyrocketed since setting clear, concise goals. After spending some time last week reviewing my current goals and setting some new ones, I'm feeling quite excited about the future. For the first time that I can remember, I am very clear about what I want in life and it feels pretty damn good. Sometimes when I set my weekly intentions, I struggle to think of some, which is where I will usually chuck in something vague like "drink 2 litres of water each day" and then inevitably, don't follow through with it. Now I have some crystal clear goals, it's so much easier and I could list several intentions I have for this week (don't worry, I won't) I'll just give you the usual three. Finish my article One of last week's intentions was to write an article, I started writing one but as I mentioned in last week's post , it was bringing back some pretty painful thoughts and feelings. I will go back to that article, but only whe

A personal time capsule Last week, I wrote a post about the importance of self reflection . I hadn’t realised how much self reflection I have been doing, it is now as much a part of my day as brushing my teeth. One important thing to remember when self reflecting, is that you must guve yourself time and space to do this, writing daily reflections mindlessly and never actually thinking about them again, serves no purpose. I was excited to see that my first weekly challenge in my 6 Minute Diary, was to write an email to my future self for 6 months time, describing where I see my life at that point in time. There were two websites given where I could use to do this. I decided to go with Future Me, which I had heard already heard of, I thought I may have even wrote a letter to myself in the past. The idea is, that you write a letter to your future self, it can say whatever you want it to, you can even get ideas from the website. You then decide when would like to receive the letter

It’s been such a positive week for me, although mindset is everything. Some things happened this week that could have dampened my spirits, but because I was in a good frame of mind, I have managed to focus on the positives and put a positive spin on some of the possible negatives. I know that I may not feel like this every week will be like this, but I plan on enjoying it for as long as it lasts. What went well for you this week? ❤️

This week, I wanted to focus on relationships. I am always very aware of how lucky I am to have the family and friends I do. We learn so much from the people we spend time with and I am truly grateful for those that I am blessed to have in my life ❤️

It’s been a mixed bag this week, but I have managed to turn it around. I enjoyed getting dressed up and going out for dinner and drinks with the girls last Friday. In the week, after having a really busy few weeks, I easily fell back into my usual routine, which helped turn my mood around. I finally wrote my article for publication! It only took me a month. I rewrote and re-read it about 7 times but I think I am happy with it now. What went well for you this week? ♥️